photography

Fishing blues, 2019.

And i ain’t gonna front like i deserve your love. i’m still trying to learn to love. it’s my long-term ambition. but the burden burns so big you can’t miss it. it was worth the tears. i want my verses to persevere. i dont need a souvenir to prove that i was here because ever since you appeared it’s been a happy new year.  from the bad to the worst, i’m a still be here.  -Atmosphere, Still Be Here, Fishing Blues, 2016

And i ain’t gonna front like i deserve your love. i’m still trying to learn to love. it’s my long-term ambition. but the burden burns so big you can’t miss it. it was worth the tears. i want my verses to persevere. i dont need a souvenir to prove that i was here because ever since you appeared it’s been a happy new year.

from the bad to the worst, i’m a still be here.

-Atmosphere, Still Be Here, Fishing Blues, 2016

03.07.18

I intend on posting more here. In a year, this website will look completely different. If not, make sure you call me out on it.

I ventured out into this wilderness with Brian today. We attempted to get some shots.

I'm editing and listening to Atmosphere.

Here are the results:

 

BUDD LAKE SNOWSTORM 03_07_18-2.jpg

SNOW DAY

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i wrote you a letter.

i know you'll never write me back.

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i don't know how to make the first move anymore.

i used to be such a sweet talker.

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i broke down like an old pick up truck in the middle of the desert:

overwhelmed, steaming, & screaming for help.

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i want my life to be different.

will you be a part of it?

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i'm not a part of some broken hearts club. i'm not some emo kid.

i'm depressed. i'm fucking sad. sometimes i feel empty. and for so long i hated myself for it. sick with the inability to be happy. symptoms: fixation on self-deprecation; acts of self-mutilation; isolation. now, i accept it. it's the only way to actually keep on living. to resist is to continue suffering in denial.

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acceptance is purpose.

i have more confidence now. you can't break me anymore. you never could.

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if you fuck it up,

that's your fault.

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i'm a realist with a utopian dream.

i'll never give up on love.